Motherhood

Ahh, motherhood. I am basking in it. I've taken to it rather easily in these first 6 weeks. I just felt like I knew what to do with my baby.

I'm grateful for the feeling especially since I was petrified of postpartum depression. And of my baby not being cute. Well thank the good Lord because neither happened.

Look at that child. 

I never met a baby that didn't like to be swaddled. He likes his hands by his face, and he will manage to get them there no matter how tight the swaddle. I like his determination. He gets that from his momma. 

Looking back on the last 6 weeks, I've noticed my love has grown for my little baby. I was expecting a mountain-top experience the first time I held him. And many well-meaning friends have inquired about my certainly unbelievable love for my newborn. I loved my son right when I saw him, but I've grown in the love I have for him. We needed to learn each other. I think that's okay. 

Many have commented on John Henry's alertness. That, he is. Mere minutes into this world, the nurses were shocked at how alert he was. One stranger said that he is very thoughtful. I like that word better. It  means he may have the ability to think things through and to be conscientious. Maybe it means he's kind or simply observant. It obviously means he's precocious. I kid. But he is really alert, whatever that means. 

For years it seems, I've prayed for God to soften my heart. I'm not a very patient person, and I've wanted to be more tolerant of others. It's hard to be around "difficult" people and to ask God to "change me". I always want God to "change them". I think God has allowed opportunities for me to be "softened", and I have had progress; very slow progress. But my baby, my sweet baby, has definitely softened me. I am more calm and patient than I have ever thought possible. When he is crying, and I am tired, I sing hymns to him, and it calms me down as well as the baby. It's my little trick. His favorites are "Come Thou Fount", "Jesus Paid It All", "Hallelujah What a Savior", "Amazing Grace", and I often throw in "You Are My Sunshine." 

I am enjoying the everyday. I've started cooking again, and it's been nice. I joined Instagram and am enjoying that entirely too much. I have a thing for low quality photography. Andrew gets mad about it. 

I do wish I had something more poignant to talk about, but that's pretty much life with a newborn. Especially since this is my first, I'm enjoying my time with my son. I can't tell you how many times I've talked to John Henry about how he better call me when he leaves the house...in 20 years. I remind him that I am the first woman he has loved. 

I'm getting back into my side business, Cherche. I am so grateful to have that as an outlet because, let's face it, no matter how much you may love your newborn, it's good to have something for yourself. 

So there. That's my latest. I hope to be back with more interesting conversation.